What's Important...

If you know me, I bet you know that I am a neat freak.  Everything needs to be in order.  It must be in order.  I guess I'm a little bit of a control freak too.  At home, I sleep best when my kitchen is spotless,. the living room is straight, the laundry is done, the dining room table is empty, and the bathrooms are shiny. 

People told me that all this would change when I had kids.  I proudly assured them that it would not.  I was going to have it all in order - even my kiddos in order - no matter what.  Well, as you have already suspected, I was wrong.  One little kiddo has changed everything already.  Right now I'm typing this standing in the kitchen (not cleaning the kitchen) because the little man naps best when he's in a wrap or a carrier on my chest while I rock and sway.  He does not nap as well when I'm bending over to empty the dishwasher or change the laundry from the washer to the dryer.  Forget cleaning the shower.  I do well to shower myself two times each day.

So - am I upset about this change in tidiness?  Sometimes.  But I saw a little poem on Facebook that a fellow mother posted and it helps me keep everything in perspective.  I am gaining so much more when I decide to put the dishes and laundry down and pick up my sweet little boy.  Because, after all, he will not be little for long.

Here's the poem by Keri Riley:

Our children will not remember their childhood the way we think they will.

They won’t remember if your hair was doing that ‘woohoo’ thing at their Christmas concert. They will remember that when they entered the gym, their eyes scanned the bleachers and locked with yours.

They won’t notice if they found their cereal bowl in the cupboard or in the dishwasher or even if they had to wash it themselves once in a while. They will remember that on Sundays, you made happy face pancakes ...

They will not remember that you cleaned and scrubbed while they were playing outside. They will remember that once you knelt in the dirt pile and vroomed Hotwheels with them all afternoon ...

They won’t remember going to the theater with friends. They will remember being pressed against your thigh on the couch, watching a movie, one hand in the popcorn bowl.

They won’t remember that you didn’t hike as fast as they did. They will remember that you climbed to the top of the steepest mountain, just to show them the view ...

They won’t care if their bed was never made or that the blanket didn’t match their curtains. They will remember the way it felt when you tucked the blankets around them and called them a burrito baby ...

They will not have lifelong damage from mud overdose. They will remember the way the ooze felt between their toes and the look on your face when you found them ... and joined in.

SO step away from the dishes. Leave that pile of laundry on the couch, forget about homework once in a while. Unclench your jaw and relax. That’s what I’m going to try to do.

Because when I am old and I am gray, and I cannot do the things that I can do today ... my children will not remember that my dishes were foul. My children will remember that I could run ... I could whoop ... and I could howl.


Love that poem.  I don't remember if my house was ever clean as a child.  I am sure that it was relatively clean because my dad made me do chores at a young age.  James will have chores at a young age too, but chores and cleanliness is never the most important thing.


Here are the most important things in my life -

"Children are not a distraction from the important work.  They are the most important work." -John Trainer, M.D.